Thursday, December 31, 2009

My FIRST post...

I'm the crazy lady that's been "stalking" everyone's band and wls blogs. I have enjoyed reading the ups and downs from everyone else so much, that I wanted to do this too! It seems therapeutic, and I know how much reading other people's wls stories have helped me to feel better about my own struggles. And, sharing in other peoples successes gives me hope!

So, what's my story? Actually, I spent my child and teen years at a normal weight, so I know what it feels like to not be fat and all the baggage that goes along with it. In a way, I think that made it even more painful when I gained lots of weight, and suddenly the world treated me very differently. In my early twenties I had two children, and I gained weight to about 280lbs. I think the weight came on because of my first husband, not the pregnancies! Anywho, after my divorce, I lost 160lbs through poverty, stress, and running. I found myself in nursing school, with two little kids, and a new found happy single life. I got down to my pre-marriage weight of 120lbs.

Fast forward a few years, and I'm graduated, awesome career, and married to Mr. Wonderful. We had a baby boy in the fall of 2004... the joy of my life. However, this time the pregnancy did make me gain weight. My thyroid shut down, and while I was trying to fix that, I started with a raging case of Fibromyalgia (caused by stress of dealing w/ teenagers). By the fall of 2008, at 299lbs, I had had enough! I was finally getting treatment by a terrific endocrinologist, was managing most of my Fibro symptoms with antidepressants... and then I found out that my insurance would begin covering bariatric surgery. I was completely nervous if I would be approved or not... I didn't think I could go on living at the weight I was at. In addition to being diagnosed with metabolic syndrome (what an insult!), I didn't want to go out, I could barely move because I was so fat, blah blah blah. My life was over at 39 years old.

Luckily, I was approved for my LapBand, and my surgery date was scheduled for April. All I could think of was how happy I'd be the second I woke up from anesthesia, knowing that the whole thing was a done deal. Now, I'm down 105lbs, weighing in at 194lbs. I want to get down to 150lbs, and skinny is not really my goal. Just happy (and of course healthy). And, getting back to knowing what thin feels like- I feel so GOOD. And by good, I mean pretty and sometimes even a little sexy. I can bend over! My husband tells me to slow down when we're walking! Guys (some of them NOT fat and old) check me out! I love to shop for clothes! In non-plus sizes!

I know I'm a little late in starting this blogging thing. But, I'm just so happy to have met this community, even if I never respond to anyone. I'm thinking I can be better about that from here on out. I feel like so many of you out there blogging are already my friend, and I have appreciated your sharing your life with me. I'm excited to join in this wls sisterhood (and guyhood...)!