Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Four years ago this weekend...
Left side, orange shirt, wide load0... that's me four summers ago, this exact same holiday weekend. July 24th is as big as the 4th in Utah, and we were doing (il)legal fireworks like we do every year. The little boy in the blue is almost six, and will be in school this fall. The bigger boy to the left of the pumpkin (me) is in college, and on Monday he is legal to by alcohol. Hooray (sarcasm).
The summer of 2006 does not bring back the best memories. My endocrine system was broken, the weight was piling on, my will to fight was being trampled down by sheer emotional exhaustion from being physically sick. There was no hope for me. WLS was not covered, and my body would simply not work with me. That left 2006 through 2008 as fairly dark years for me, until I learned at the end of 2008 that the bariatric rider would be picked up by my insurance plan. I was determined to be the first. It was only a 50/50 benefit... but I did it. I had to do it. And it has been so worth it. I would pay almost anything to be the person I am now verses the woman I was from 2006 until 2009... hopeless, sad, fat, depressed. And now I'm doing things for me, going for jobs, tackling issues head on with direct problem solving, it's so much and it's so much BETTER.
There's more to this, but I'm getting tired. Just wanted you to get a good look at the old fat assess me, so you can see how far I've come. That way if I get cranky about where I'm at now... we'll all know the truth of the matter. I keep these clothes and pictures lest I never forget where it is I have come from. ok, enoough melelcholy...but holy frijoles... it's crazy amazing..
You find your, too...and share the pics and the feelings... Please? It would help others. Let's speak our honest!!!