Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Dream job called, again

The job was offered to me today.

So, now's probably a bad time to ask... but any thoughts on jobs that require all travel? I knew what it was when I hit "send"- I know it will be difficult, but for the experience- I figure it will be well worth it. Any last "hell no, don't do its" ???

Mr. W says I'll do just fine because I'm used to doing hard things... huh, huh, huh- (insert sexual inuendo here).

On the positive side, I need to buy clothes. My current boss is so sweet- we went suit shopping over the weekend. It's weird for me to buy things without looking for a sale. But, it's awesome fitting into, and looking half way decent in clothes. Although I have to admit I still always check out the plus size clothing... just to see what's there...

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Can you believe it was a year ago?

We had a big birthday party today for my grandson's first birthday. Needless to say this year has felt like it's flown by. The baby is now a little boy, and my little girl is now a grown woman... oh, that's weird to say...

She really went to alot of trouble and planning to make this party special, and she did a terrific job. She insisted on making capcakes and frosting from scratch- which turned out delicious, but I think she's going to make things much simpler for herself with future birthday baking, etc...

It was a lovely day, but the mix of people was bizarre, and I'm an emotional cripple (ugh). Let's recap who was there? Baby's dad (who I have not seen in a year), his parents (who adopted him), his aunt (who is really his birth mother), her children, their grandparents (divorced), the grandfather's parents (about 100 years old), other aunts and cousins from the dad's side. Also in attendance was my daughter's dad (my ex-husband), my ex m-i-l-, my ex-husband's daughter (from the woman he cheated with), my in-laws (baby's step-grandparents), my sister & her family, my brother & his family, my husband's children (baby's step-aunt and step-uncle), a few other friends of my daughter's- and I think that's close to everyone.

Tonight my step-daughter and my ex-husband's daughter are having a sleepover in our downstairs family room together. Who would have guessed that scenario? Not me. This whole day was just so strange- and I did my shut down thing again. I really hate that. I wish I didn't get that way because I looked pretty good, my career is awesome, I have a fabulous husband, and everything about the party was wonderful. It would make more sense to take the perfect opportunity to go around and gloat- but I just emotionally retreat. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.

I was overwhelmed and I've been absolutely exhausted this week. Trying to knock stuff out of the ball park at work. I got an email from the recruiter for the job I interviewed for, and also from the VP who flew me out- both saying they were just checking references. Which I assume means that they are going to offer me the job? Well, as long as my references are favorable, and they WILL be good. My current boss is completely supportive, and gives me lots of positive feedback. I will feel bad if I leave her, but she understands that the political climate of our organization is what it is, and that this could be the opportunity of a lifetime. I told the HR guy he was welcome to call any of my previous employers (because I know they'll all give me stellar reviews).

Anyway, I'm physically and emotionally exhausted, and I wish I had not been so introverted today, and I feel like I'm walking a tight wire, and hopefully I'll get lots of sleep tonight, and rest tomorrow, and my life will go back to a little slower pace. Or not, if I get this new job. I know I must secretly thrive on stress. But, good thing is... I'm only chubby now... and my stomach is flat... which I love every single day. I could use some lipo and a boob job, but all in good time...

Even if I didn't do so well today, it was still neat to see all these people get together for one very loved little guy. Each year brings things I never would have guessed... life is truly stranger than fiction...

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Are you too nervous to eat?

That was the question I got at the interview breakfast today... and I was trying to eat, but I'm a picker now... however I did eat all of my bacon... one bite of toast (and that's an accomplishment as many bandsters can attest to), and a couple of bites of egg. We went to a diner type of place, so the choices were limited. I actually wasn't nervous, and thanks to some good advice, I just said I wasn't much of a breakfast eater, and that the food was delicious, and left the explanation at that.

The presentation went well, and I think the interview process was good. I go on automatic pilot, and just cross my fingers that I'm stringing words and sentences correctly! The feedback was positive, yet I still wonder if they were just being nice to let me down easily. The very last thing we discussed was salary and start dates, and we were on the same page with those. I'd like to think that was a positive sign. Honestly, I've never not gotten a job I've gone for, and I don't know how I'd handle that. I think I'd be fine. I'm a believer in everything happening for a reason. They'll let me know by next week...

So I'm back at my parents for all of six hours, and we've already resumed the food tour of my home town. It appears I actually didn't get to everything last month when I was here. This is when I love my band. It's a broken record coming from me, but it's awesome to be friends with food. I can enjoy a little of everything. Food really does seem to be love for families and that seems to be a universal thing. And I love food. Wow, that's alot of love here.

It's a relief the interview process is over, and I'm going to take it easy for awhile. I've been putting so much time and emotional energy into it- I'm glad it's done. I fly back to Utah on Saturday, and Mr. W and I have a Poison/ Motley Crue concert on Sunday. Did anyone see
"Hot Tub Time Machine"? These was were the two of the bands featured in that movie. We love all things 80's- even if I wasn't a headbanger when I was a teenager- it's fun to go back. My dad asked me "who goes to these concerts?" ...and I told him the PTA. It's true- who let's all the parents into these shows???

I'm off to see if blogger will update and then spend some time reading posts. I'm still a terrible commenter, but I'm actually a good reader! It's fun, and I'm constantly learning and enjoying following everyone's journeys. I wonder if I'll ever lose interest, but I don't think so. I'm going to go snag some Ben & Jerry's really quick, because I'm good calorie wise. This is shaping up to be a very relaxing night!

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Breakfast !?!

My interview next Thursdays is scheduled to start- with breakfast!?! I can't eat in the mornings. I think I can eat oatmeal without needing to head for the restroom. Is it wrong that I don't want first introductions to include eating issues? Help !?!

Band update: Well, there really isn't one. Weight is steady- for well over a year now. Still eat whatever I want- just smaller portions. Size 12- top and bottom. Restriction remains. Everything and every reason I got my band for is happening- physical and mental health, clothes and shopping, fitting into society better (literally and figuratively), and obtaining what I thought I needed to progress professionally.

But, I am admittedly abnormal in my ability to eat- and I am also admittedly not sure how to deal with this in a new social situation. Can't I just pretend I was never fat?

Wednesday, June 1, 2011


Today my daughter graduates from high school! She's really gotten her act together, and I'm proud of her accomplishment. The expectation was for no less than this, and what I'm the most proud of to this point, is that she's registered for all of her college classes in the fall. From my experience (or lack of)- education will be key for her to live a fulfilled life.

Speaking of lack of education... my face to face interview is on June 16th in Philadelphia. They don't usually interview people with "your profile". I GET IT! But, someone is smart enough to see that I am more than capable. The phone interview went very well. I think "who" I knew was what convinced them of "what" I knew. That's kind of a bummer because I was excited to talk shop with someone. The face to face is just to make sure that I dress professionally (HOW I LOOK- THANK YOU BAND), that I can handle myself professionally (it's only eight hours a day!?!), and that I can give a damn good presentation (and I can).

It's strange to think that only two weeks ago my grandmother passed away, and all the emotion that went along with that. Here we are now- life goes on and the good comes after the difficult. I want lots of good things for my daughter's life, and today marks that beginning.