Thinness pays off. That's my real title, but the one I posted sounds more titilating. I know I've discussed in my many tirades on the f-ism word, about how I really identify with, and in my head still feel like an obese girl. Now that I'm a juicy size 14, it's funny, because I feel thin and sexy. For some of us, we weren't always obese, and I remember when I thought 14 was HUGE. Now, I think it's downright sexy hot. I've worked really hard to be this chubby! And seriously, even at this weight, this level of thinness or chubbiness, I don't know which- is really paying off. So, where does the revenge come in? Because people are treating me so much better as a thin/chubby person, but in my head I'm still 300 lbs. Ha! Take THAT world!
For example, this morning I went out to my garage and guess what? FLAT TIRE. So, I stop at the gas station around the corner for some air. And guess what? DELIVERY TRUCK PARKED IN FRONT OF THE AIR I NEED. With a flat tire, I can't start driving all around looking for an alternate air source, so I do the next best thing, and ridiculously start trying to angle my car in close enough for the air hose to reach. That probably entertained a few folks for a minute or two. After realizing my plan was simply not going to work, I took a deep breath, and went into the store to find the truck driver. Ballsy, I know. I eyed him at the back of the store, and as sweetly as I could, walked over to him and asked him if he could move his truck because I had a flat tire. He didn't look up at me at first, and was not very helpful. Then... he looked up. Did I mention I have on my size 14 jeans, and a great push up bra, and that with all this weight loss, I've managed to keep my ass high and boobs full? Seriously, the guy looks up, and not only agrees to move his truck, but fills my tires, tops them ALL off, and I literally had to stop him short of starting to wash my car for me. HA! Dude, I'm a 300 lb woman! Ha ha ha. That, my friends, is sweet revenge.
Even better than that, was my shopping trip at lunch yesterday. THINNESS PAYS OFF AT KOHL'S! I had to CHOOSE between clothes, because so many things fit, and LOOKED GOOD. I ended up with a Daisy Fuentes top with a great plunging neck line, and a pair of open toed, back strapped high heels. This is an outfit I could NOT wear to work, under any circumstances. I felt really SEXY. Dare I say I LOOKED really sexy? Seriously, girls, I have some self image problems, so for me to feel that good, is beyond words. It was NOT a 300 lb woman being reflected back to me in the dressing room mirror. I wanted so badly to look good for my party tomorrow night, and was hopeful that I'd at least look "ok", and looking "WOW" was definitely not even an expectation. However, it was a fabulous surprise. Maybe it was a gift. The best birthday gift I've ever had. Thank you band. I deeply, humbly thank you.
Pictures will be posted from my party. I know everyone is dying to see my outfit. Or the male stripper. But, I'm pretty sure it's me you'll want to see. Or the hot fireman doing a very naughty dance. One or the other. It's probably a toss up (or not). ;)
Happy Weekend to everyone, I really love my band friends!